Is Desire an Illusion..??

I always wonder, what is Desire..? Is it something we need to have or want to have..!! Or is the lust, anger, ego, love, jealousy and many more.  Hmmm I think.. What do I think..? I seriously don't have an answer for this..! But, let me just give it a try.

 People always tell me to aim high, dream high.. is it looking at the sky ..? I guess not. And they also tell me to have the urge and desire to do something great, different and unique. Again confusion :-( what is that 'something great' 'different' and 'unique' that "I" need to do.  Is it not a problem for you people as well.? Well let me crack this issue.

I sit back and think, hmmm..! Do I really have to think about all these complex things at this age? But when I look deep into it, I wonder why do people want me to think about all these..uff, I always get into this confusion and think there's some serious problem with me, my attitude, my perception and my behavior.. Well who cares!  This kind of ego has made my life so miserable, though my conscious always think something else, but what I do is something different.. Am I truthful to myself... No I am NOT..!!

Every one fakes around and even I do the same, Rat Race..! I pity myself.. But why am I not able to portray myself, the way I am..??  It is because of the desire to get things done, get noticed, grab attention of people around me and to make my life simpler.. But am I enjoying being this way.. Surely not.

I just don't stop at this, I begin to explore myself. "The Desire for Self Exploration" Who am ‘I’? What do 'I' need..? What am 'I' to my parents, society and my friends..? I just feel miserable, the dilemma kills me..But why..?? I myself know the answer for this, It is because I have not done anything to anyone other than satisfying my own desire, I am selfish.. plz.. Not just me, even ‘YOU’.                       

If  I am sweet to others , it is only because I am expecting more of it, if I am helping others, I am expecting more of a help from them. What a self fish bugger I am..! This is what I call the desire for self survival, the desire for getting things done, the desire for expectation.

That's lot of a gyan for you people, but the best always comes at the last. LOVE, I laugh when I listen to this word. I seriously laugh my ass out. This word has lost its meaning, I pity the person who actually gave the meaning for this wonderful word, don't you..? I always felt true love is what you get from your mom and dad, pure love and affection without any expectation. But, just be honest and think for a while about LOVE, do you remember your mom and dad or at least the purity behind the word..I don't think so.

We all are bloody losers; we have changed it all together. As soon as we think of love, we go back to college, a few people even go back to school..Oh my god..! Love and relationship's are just for physical pleasure. I am sorry, I respect a few. But most of them are just infatuation and attraction. I am sorry if u have got into it, I am sure it's just for pleasure. Just think over it , there is so much of desperecy, untruthfulness, hatred, jealousy and the list goes on.. Why is this for all about..??  It is the desire for pleasure..!

Buddha said "desire is the cause of all misery. If your desire does not get fulfilled it leads to frustration and causes misery and if it does get fulfilled, it leaves you empty".

Desire will kill all your truthfulness, happiness and joy, but the ultimate object of all desire is joy and happiness, plz mark these words, if at all you feel you are depressed and have lost all the happiness in your life, it is only because of  DESIRE. We always feel that desires will lead to happiness but trust me, it doesn't.. Life is crazy, Take it easy. I will conclude with a question in all of your minds. Hope you get your answer as soon as possible.

Is Desire an Illusion..??